Emotional Intelligence – Higher Order Skills

Mastered Emotional Intelligence Core Skills? Are you able to manage your own emotional energy?

Now you can use EI to lead and empower others by utilizing EI higher order skills

by s-t-r-a-n-g-e

Daniel A. Feldman offers higher order EI skills in his book Emotionally Intelligent Leadership: Inspiring Others to Achieve Results  

The Higher Order Skills

  • Taking responsibilities
    • Acting independently and with accountability
    • Owning a problem as well as a resolution
  • Generating choices
    • Be open to varied possibilities in anything
    • Discover available choices and help other recognize it
  • Embracing a Vision
    • Committing to a particular view of the future
    • Need to have guide actions and to be communicated to others.
  • Having courage to:
    • Look at my choices and myself
    • Take responsibility
    • Buck trends and standard modes of operation
    • Make tough decisions
  • Demonstrating resolve
    • Make decisions what to do with firm determination
    • Demonstrate commitment to a plan of action

Techniques

  • Responsibility checklist
    • Am I making a contribution?
    • Am I fully accepting the consequences of the actions I’ve taken?
    • In light of my subordinates’ reactions, is what I am doing discouraging them or uplifting then?
    • Based on my actions thus far, whom am I serving?
  • Choice building
    • Let go of the need to be always right, of having only valid solution, of the need to control.
    • Solicit choices from others
    • Invite ideas from outside my current experience and culture
  • Vision linking
    • Select vision that I can willingly and actively embrace
    • Use metaphors to make accessible by others
    • Own it and live it
    • Incorporate it in my daily language
  • Lighting the fire
    • Recognize what I am afraid of
    • Focus on the benefits, not fear, of taking the risk
    • Tolerate the discomfort
    • Practice by envisioning the steps to success.
  • Firming up
    • Choose reachable and worthwhile long-term goals according to my values
    • Build short term targets
    • Develop a support network for my intention
    • Anticipate and prepare for difficulties and obstacles
    • Continually renew my resolutions.

About the Author:

This blog is dedicated to share simple practices I that get me results.

11 Comments on "Emotional Intelligence – Higher Order Skills"

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  1. Vered says:

    “Let go of the need to be always right, of having only valid solution, of the need to control.”

    This is a tough one for me. Thank you for the reminder. I have promised myself in the past to work on that, but I keep sliding into old control-freakish habits.

  2. Mike King says:

    Thanks for the outline Alik. What did you actually think of the book though? Did you like it, learn new content from it? Is it unique? I’m curious what your opinion is on this one aside from the outline you’ve given. What to share a few comments on that aspect?

  3. Alik -

    My first job after finishing my post graduate studies was with Emerson Electric. I remember that my boss, Greg Mudzinksi, told me once when I talked about problems – “Don’t come to me unless you can offer a solution.”
    That’s was a great EI lesson for me.

    Shilpan

  4. alik levin says:

    @Vered
    You just perfectly demonstrated your EI core skill – Knowing Yourself.

    @Mike
    The book is consumable – it is thin – and well formatted. And it offers a lots of practical and applicable value (I hope the post just showed that). I am having hard times with big books – I want to read it but I am slow reader. That is why I am after either thin books or digest. No wonder JD’s The Book Share blog (http://thebookshare.blogspot.com/) is on my radar. The other great place for me is http://www.getabstract.com/. It is hard for me to tell it is unique or not. I’ve bought it since I needed to improve my EI and the booked seemed OK to me. I liked it and turned to EI classic books, most recommended on Amazon. I’ve bought it too and stopped reading it after two first pages – it was not consumable for me.

    @Shilpan
    That was a wakeup call too! My mentor tells me that bringing something on the table is crucial to create your own voice. He also tells me to be part of the solution otherwise you are part of the problem…. He is very wise guy

  5. Chris says:

    I’m fully aware of all these things. My problem is that my laziness or failure to the things neccessary to make all these happen.

  6. Mike King says:

    Thanks for your reply Alik. Glad to hear its an easy read. I agree that it can be hard to get through big books sometimes! I’d suggest looking into some speed reading books or software since that can make a HUGE impact on reading speed so you can devour a whole lot more books. Also audio books if you have a commute time or listening time can really help get through more books. That is my preferred method.

    Just started looking at JD’s The Book Share as well after reading some comments from him on my blog. Great to hear you have been looking as well. Take care!

  7. alik levin says:

    @Chris
    If you are aware of all these then you mastered your core EI skills. It is up to you to decide whether you’d like to move forward with higher EI order skills

    @Mike
    What are speed reading books like?

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